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Is Your Spouse Spying On You?

Is your spouse acting a bit more odd and “snoopy” than normal? If you think your spouse is spying on you, you should probably trust your gut instinct. What are some things you should watch out for and how can you prevent it?

There are many reasons a spouse may spy on you, but some of the most common we see in our practice are:

  • He or she suspects you of cheating.
  • You have given him or her reason to not trust you, such as unfaithfulness in the past.
  • He or she is cheating. Very often, a spouse spies to protect his or her infidelities, to avoid getting caught.
  • He or she feels the need to control you.
  • The two of you are involved in a custody battle and he or she wants to try to gather evidence against you as unfit.

The typical signs to watch for are:

  • He or she regularly questions you about where you have been and whom you have been with. This action will be more than what a genuinely concerned partner would ask. It will be more in the form of a demand to know these things.
  • On the other hand, your partner may know about places you have been and who you have been with before you’ve had the chance to tell him or her yourself.
  • Your partner deflects your questioning as to why he or she wants to know these things onto you as being paranoid or defensive. Often, the spying spouse tries to make you feel like you are in the wrong.
  • Your phone or computer displays out of the ordinary activity. For example, the screen is different from the way you left it. Your phone may need more frequent charging than normal. This may indicate increased data transmission.
  • Your phone shows activity when not in use. If your phone is lighting up and making noises out of the ordinary or reboots for no reason, this may indicate someone has remote access to your device.
  • Your spouse guards his or her own privacy with practiced determination.
  • You simply have an uneasy feeling of being watched.

How should you avoid been of victim of spying?

  • Check your home for spy cameras. These days cameras are easy to obtain at a reasonable price and easy to hide. One way to do this is via a physical sweep. Turn off all the lights and walk slowly around checking for tiny LEDs that indicate a device is active. There are some inexpensive bug sweepers on the market to help you track down the hardware.
  • Check your vehicle for tracking devices.
  • Use a strong password or fingerprint recognition for your devices. Avoid using the same password for all devices.
  • Install an anti-virus software and regularly run a clean-up.
  • Set your phone to airplane mode when not in use.

How to find spy software on your phone (Android or iOS):

Android:  Go to Settings > Applications > Manage Applications or Running Services. This can help you find suspicious looking files. Some spy programs do a better job than others at hiding these files. Some of the less expensive programs are quite easy to spot with names that contain terms like “spy” and “monitor”.

Note:  It is not advisable that you delete any files you are not sure about.  We suggest bringing the phone to us or your local phone dealer to help you determine which files belong on the phone and which do not.

iPhone:  In order to add spy software to an iPhone, your spouse would have to jailbreak it. It is not as easy as the Android to find spy software on the iPhone, but you can easily remove spy software by upgrading to the latest OS version. The upgrade will remove the jailbreak and any external non-Apple software.

Note:  Be sure to back-up important data before upgrading the latest OS version.

In our experience at Kevin Hickey Law Partners, your gut instinct is typical right. If you don’t think things are the way they ought to be or you feel uneasy, you should trust yourself. Contact us today and we can help you throughout the entire process.