This exceptional post came across my feed the other day: "[My son] is missing his Dad terribly. We've been doing video calls and meetings through doors but we can't keep this up much longer. [My ex] is still working with the public and worried about exposure. Ideas on how to safely allow an overnight visit, play time, or at least a hug?"

This kind of co parenting is rare. Too often, parents use children as a way to hurt their former spouse. This not only damages the children, but it damages any credibility they need in court. Co parenting during this pandemic has been pushed to its limits. We, as attorneys, are seeing the best in parents and the absolute worst right now. 

During 2020's spring break, children were withheld from visitation for unjustified reasons, although parents used Covid-19 as an excuse. Judges were making emergency decisions and had little sympathy for parents weaponizing this deadly virus against one another. Even if your child is vulnerable (asthma or diabetes or another health condition) or the other parent is an essential worker, there are ways to maintain a relationship between parents and children. Video chats, social distance dinners, lunches, and chats can be arranged. The point of co parenting right now is the same it always has been: whatever is in the best interest of the child. It is in the best interest of your child to be in good health, physically and mentally. Parents sharing the care and raising of children, but in separate homes, are going to make choices to keep their children safe from the virus and keep them in contact with the people whom they love the most--their mom and dad. 

With summer break approaching, and potential spikes in the virus as we move toward more states opening, communicate with your fellow parent. This is the perfect opportunity to decide exactly what activities are safe for your children, if you should travel to other states, and whether or not interaction with other people and children will be allowed. Even though you trust each other, get it in writing. The care and safety of your children has never been more important.

We live in an unprecedented time. Pay attention to the advice of experts. Remember your rights and the rights of your children. Remember, it will get better, and we are here to help.

I heard someone describe this COVID-19 crisis in an interesting way: With other natural disasters, things generally happen in a big dramatic fashion and are over rather quickly (this isn't to say the aftermath isn't any less devastating), but for this virus and our community, it is the constant doom and dread of what is still yet to come. 

We are a society of instants: Instagram, Instacart, instant gratification, Instant Po, etc. This is extremely hard on nearly everyone in this state and community because of the timeline we are having to make drastic changes to our lives.  It is COMPLETELY normal to experience some stress related to this change. All changes, either for good or for bad create stress in most people.  During this pandemic, while good and conscientious citizens do their best to maintain social distancing, there are still plenty of healthy coping skills we can utilize.  Stress usually causes a spike in cortisol and during extreme periods, peaks of epinephrine and glucose and many other hormones are increased in our brains. Our body responds to these changes appropriately (eyes dilate, heart rate increases, breathing rate increases, etc.). One way to manage lower levels of stress is to teach our body how to control these responses. 

 Mindfulness is an important technique and usually starts with being aware of our breathing. Any breathing exercises, or activities like yoga or stretching, can help us focus on our body's ability to control some of these responses. 

 More vigorous exercise is also strongly encouraged, as it reminds our body how increase in heart rate and breathing can be a natural and healthy thing for us to experience (It can mimic some symptoms of a panic attack, but allows the person to experience it in a safe and "controlled" setting, thereby helping the person experience a type of exposure therapy.).  My own children have found different online dance games, and enjoy the activity--which is fun and also great exercise.  

Low impact or high, it remains vitally important for everyone to get forms of exercise in, whether that be through virtual platforms and games, or for actual walks, jogs, biking activities down the driveway or street. 

 In addition to the physical coping of stress, there are important "intellectual" ways to manage high stress as well.  Distraction techniques like listening to a favorite soundtrack, classical music, or reading a favorite old novel can all be enjoyable ways to escape.  Playing an old instrument, getting out the drawing paper, pencils and brushes are wonderful ways to put your own current feelings into something you can see and touch. Using all our senses becomes much more doable during these hours of "downtime".      

Try to manage your stress during this time with what you can control. Find ways to turn something negative into a positive. Be mindful, move your body, and exercise your mind. These are all ways to manage the negative effects of any change, so be in the moment and take this time to reset.

Dr. Kindrick is the Assistant Medical Director at the Center for Psychiatric Wellness

I heard someone describe this COVID-19 crisis in an interesting way: With other natural disasters, things generally happen in a big dramatic fashion and are over rather quickly (this isn't to say the aftermath isn't any less devastating), but for this virus and our community, it is the constant doom and dread of what is still yet to come. 

We are a society of instants: Instagram, Instacart, instant gratification, Instant Po, etc. This is extremely hard on nearly everyone in this state and community because of the timeline we are having to make drastic changes to our lives.  It is COMPLETELY normal to experience some stress related to this change. All changes, either for good or for bad create stress in most people.  During this pandemic, while good and conscientious citizens do their best to maintain social distancing, there are still plenty of healthy coping skills we can utilize.  Stress usually causes a spike in cortisol and during extreme periods, peaks of epinephrine and glucose and many other hormones are increased in our brains. Our body responds to these changes appropriately (eyes dilate, heart rate increases, breathing rate increases, etc.). One way to manage lower levels of stress is to teach our body how to control these responses. 

 Mindfulness is an important technique and usually starts with being aware of our breathing. Any breathing exercises, or activities like yoga or stretching, can help us focus on our body's ability to control some of these responses. 

 More vigorous exercise is also strongly encouraged, as it reminds our body how increase in heart rate and breathing can be a natural and healthy thing for us to experience (It can mimic some symptoms of a panic attack, but allows the person to experience it in a safe and "controlled" setting, thereby helping the person experience a type of exposure therapy.).  My own children have found different online dance games, and enjoy the activity--which is fun and also great exercise.  

Low impact or high, it remains vitally important for everyone to get forms of exercise in, whether that be through virtual platforms and games, or for actual walks, jogs, biking activities down the driveway or street. 

 In addition to the physical coping of stress, there are important "intellectual" ways to manage high stress as well.  Distraction techniques like listening to a favorite soundtrack, classical music, or reading a favorite old novel can all be enjoyable ways to escape.  Playing an old instrument, getting out the drawing paper, pencils and brushes are wonderful ways to put your own current feelings into something you can see and touch. Using all our senses becomes much more doable during these hours of "downtime".      

Try to manage your stress during this time with what you can control. Find ways to turn something negative into a positive. Be mindful, move your body, and exercise your mind. These are all ways to manage the negative effects of any change, so be in the moment and take this time to reset.